Another total shower

After not updating for two weeks my page has shown an increase in number of viewers. This just goes to show something, and for once I know what that shows. However, I am now prepared for the drop in viewers as I write my latest blog.

I think my bad luck with showers is continuing. Recently the skin on my hands and eyes started getting bad again. My hands got really dry and started itching. In fact, my fingerprints have totally changed when this first happened three years ago. Finally I can admit to that big job I done where I got my mate right strung up like a kipper.

My eyes are even worse. They get really sore so I inadvertently rub them, causing the skin to peel off. Then they start to weep. Which makes me want to rub them even more. Eventually I end up with eyelids like a lizard. It made for interesting pictures from my University days when my eyes always seemed glazed over.

So anyway, my skin started getting bad again so I went to the Doctors. As usual they were useless. They didn't offer me any cream for my eyes other than the standard E45 (which I can get anywhere) and just asked me questions about if I was happy at work and at home. Stress might play a part, but I've never felt worried enough about work to keep me up at night. I guess as I'm near prime suicide age that came into play too.

Luckily I had someone without medical expertise on the case, but someone who could solve the problem. It was Freya. Who asked "Have you changed shampoo." Except with a question mark at the end of her sentence.

No I hadn't but I had changed back to my old shower gel - Original Mint Source. So I went back to another shower gel. Hands went back to normal straight away, eyes are taking a bit longer but are no longer weepy.

But shame on you Original Mint Source! Why don't you say anything about the fact your product causes bad reactions in those with delicate skin. Oh, it says 'Uses essential oils which causes reaction in some skin types'. So I went through two years of terrible skin due to my inability to read. Thanks eyes. Thighs.

Larry David Walk

Oh dear. Another LD-style incident for myself today. Walking around town at lunch I saw a very cute redhead, which as we know, turned my head. To be honest I was staring rather slack-jawed towards her. It was only as she walked past I realised that her arm had been amputated and she had no right hand.

Hopefully she realised I was only staring at her because she was gorgeous not for the other reason. Either way I was wrong for staring. I apologise cute one handed redhead.

Prime Vs Webb

So we went to see The Bourne Ultimatum tonight. It was great, the only problem for me was that the pace never let up. Bourne was always running, fighting, driving and sometimes I think it could've helped by slowing down a bit. However, that's a minor problem. Everything else about it is excellent. Definitely better than the last film I saw.

Except it didn't have giant robots that changed into cars, so Transformers was actually better.

Sorry Matt.

Watabe news

Date: Thursday 5th June 2008

Time: 5pm

Location: The Merchant Adventurers Hall, York

Bride: Freya Stephanie Aimee Whiteley

Groom: Benjamin David Hall

Cost: Quite a bit, but well worth it

Attendance: Let me know and I'll see if I can get you in

Currently Listening to: Emmy the Great

Mood: Excited!

Tiredness rating: zz out of ZZZZZ

Eagle Vs Ben Vs Predator Vs Army of Darkness Vs Freya (sewing edition)

Freya & I don't fight that much. Or rather, we try to avoid fighting. Usually when I feel myself getting angry or stressed about something I go to another room, grumble to myself and then come back refreshed. Freya on the other hand always keeps it to herself until it comes out (usually accompanied by tears).

However I feel that the most recent dispute we've had needs to be settled. Who is the best at sewing?

Freya's entry:

Made last weekend, this yellow Cat Doll was inspired by Lost at Sea, by Bryan Lee O'Malley which is apparently rather good. I've yet to read it, as Freya keeps it on her side of the bed and due to the fight I'm unable to cross the bed border.



Cat Doll was filled with quinoa, and is made out of yellow fabric. Freya says that next time she makes Cat Doll she will do the face first before sewing up.



Ben's entry:

The unofficial Nottingham Forest FC felt pencil case. Made fourteen years ago at school under sewing tuition from my Dad. This unique design shows a strange type of tree where the trunk is as wide as the tree itself. Also renaming Forest 'Fores' is an obvious dig at those who call the team Notts Forest.



The back has an interesting play on the umbro logo and due to space & time restrictions the sponsors name is spread over two lines rather than the obvious one.



So which one is best? I'll leave it up to you to decide.

No man's (hair) is an Island

I'm now fully resigned to the fact that I will be bald within five years. My temples are getting higher and higher every time I get my haircut. I'm not surprised by this as everytime I wash my hair I seem to leave a thin covering of hair in the bath. Seriously, it's like Chewbacca was molting in there.

This wasn't such a problem when my hair was growing at a similar rate, but it looks as though it's now given up the effort.

The main problem is that, because the temples are rising yet my front locks are staying in place I'm going to end up with an Island of hair on the top of my head. In short I'm going to look like this guy:

Ben, five years later, yesterday*

Or the guy from Super Tennis who looked as though he had a coin slot in his head.

Either way, I'm fully prepared for it. At least I'll save myself paying nearly thirty quid for a haircut by getting Freya to do it with some clippers. And I won't have to worry about whether the hairdresser fancies me or not as (hopefully) Freya still will when I'm bald.

* Seeing Yordan Lechkov reminds me how happy I was when he scored against Germany. I actually ran out into the street in our German village and shouted at the top of my lungs. Strange that at Germany 2006 I actually wanted Germany to do better than England. And probably will for every other tournament from now on.

Tweezer homes league

You may recall that last month I was mildly annoyed by how long it took to go through baggage check at Stansted airport. However, it remained at a mild level of annoyance as I realise that it's best that people don't get on board with things that can blow up, or that they can stab people with.

I've never been someone who gets properly furious at these checks. Even when security found some nail clippers in my bag & threw them away I didn't get upset. I knew the rules and I should've put them in my main bag.

Now I've lost all respect for them. Because I've been breaking airport security for the past year and never been caught.

Alright, so it was only a pair of tweezers. And they were wedged securely into a front pocket of my bag, but you'd have thought that at least one person who did security at Manchester, Paris (twice), Narita-Tokyo, Stansted or Munich airports would have noticed that it was in my bag.

Like TV license detector vans I now believe the security machines at airports to have absolutely nothing within them.

I'm now off to sneeze uncontrollably. Bye!